Big 2-0❤️!

It’s here! It’s finally here!

Hey guys!

It’s been a long time since I’ve sent you anything hasn’t it? Apologies. Life has just been so busy. As some of you know, I’ve been interning at Cowrywise for the past few weeks. Being a working class babe actually feels so surreal tbh. Idk if it’s just Cowrywise but I can’t seem to understand why so many 9-5ers complain anymore.

That aside, you know what today is?

*cues go shortie, it’s your birthday*

Exactly. It’s only the day I’ve been dreaming of yet dreading for most of my life. It feels like I’m growing up so fast and I can’t seem to control it. Oh well.

Anyways, I saw a video a few months back that helped me understand starting a new decade isn’t just celebrating your future but looking into your past self as well. Through introspection, you begin to see you, the changes you’ve gone through from birth to adulthood, the person you are and still becoming. As such, here’s my little trip with you through my life.

P.S. I couldn’t find a lot of photos from my early years so I’m just doing half decade recaps.

Here’s me at five at Rosellas before it got torn down.

This part of my life, I don’t recall so well. Some parts stand out for me though. I used to have an aunt who every time her boyfriend came over, she made us turkey. Now she was taking the money from the profits from mother’s shop but we didn’t speak up cause we always had some. He always brought apples too. I loved apples. Still do.

A core memory though? It’s kinda funny. So, my nursery school was right by my compound and the house was still under construction ( we lived in a little bungalow at the back at the moment). Anyways, I had this friend who stayed late a lot. So once, I went to the upstairs of our uncompleted building, saw her in the compound and called out her name. She saw me and immediately tossed a stone. Till today, I do not know why. I, however, tossed stones back. By the time I went downstairs, my aunt was waiting for me. In our stone throwing fiasco, we had broken the back windshield of my mother’s new Silver bird(The car o, it’s the car)💀

Simply put, I’m lucky to be alive.

Honorable mention, my fifth birthday party was one of the most memorable ones. I was half the star of the show. My brother and I were born 4 years, 11 months and 20 days apart. As such, we celebrated a lot of our birthdays together. This was an example of those. It was really cool though. Got this huge purple teddy as a present. Still wondered what happened to him sometimes.

Here’s me at nine years, six months (couldn’t find a photo for ten)

Peep the name plate pendant💀

I like numbers, very much. I didn’t figure that out till I was about 8 and coming up with several ways to do the 8-12 times tables without actually multiplying them. I assume this is where my tendencies to have(and love) perfect even numbers and symmetry every time arose from. I digress.

About this photo, it was my mother’s birthday. I had seen boys before flowers episodes a few days back and there was this episode that they sang the birthday song in Korean. I somehow got it into my head that I wanted to sing that for my mother. In public. With horrible make up on(my eyebrows have never been that full😭😭). I was terrified, who isn’t actually? But I did it. And I hated it of course😂 People simply didn’t get it and it’s hard to appreciate what you don’t get isn’t it?

Ten was a pivotal time in my life. I had to decide what school I wanted to go to, if I really wanted to sterling bank bag for saving 50k or a birthday party, realizing I’d be leaving primary school and the book haven that I totally didn’t steal books from behind. It seemed like all the problems of the world lay upon my shoulders and it was heavy weight for a small child who just wanted to grow up quickly. I made it through of course.

Here’s me at fifteen. The only photo I have of that time that I can find.

MY PHONE SHUT DOWN A FEW WEEKS LATER LMAOOOO💀 That aside, this photo signifies freedom. I was a protected child(still am) and it was my first time going to Unilag on my own. My secondary school was less than a kilometer from it but I had never been in it without my mother driving us down to see my siblings. The feeling was exhilarating. I got to do everything I wanted y’know. Walked to get Pizza at Domino’s with my friend, visited the GT YouLibrary, got my face painted at the sports event, bought food from Korede’s Spag for the first time (my classmates and the peer pressure was insane), went home on my own for the first time( it was Unilag to Fola Agoro) but it was special. It was a wonderful day. I also opened Instagram cause I took this photo and it meant so much to me.

My teens aren’t much to speak of. Just the regular getting in trouble in JSS, culture shock in a senior school where I had 32 classmates, quite different from the regular 4. There was also the over achiever stint but I’m healing from that.

Most importantly, it was the time I lost the most important man in my life, my father. I recall coming home from the zoo that day with an ostrich feather in my hand, excited to call him and tell him all about it. When I heard the news, I didn’t cry. A few years back, he had played a prank on me, pretending to be dead by the time I got home from school. There and then, we’d made a promise I wouldn’t cry. Other than that, I think I was just broken. I shut down everything, shut out everyone and literally just moved around on autopilot. I’m proud to say I’m currently healing and actually dealing with my issues so that’s a huge W.

Here’s me at 19 cause I ain’t 20 till I’m 20😌

The past five years? E rough like mad😂. I’ve been on a journey of self discovery constantly. From my anime girl era in 2020 to guitar kid in 2021 to chef in 2022 to writer in 2023 and finally HR and believer in 2024. I think I’ve found my happy place. That little girl who wanted to be an Astronaut all those years ago? I think she’d be disappointed we haven’t gone into space yet but she’s proud of who we’ve grown up to become. I grow daily, learning new things, seeing new stuff and forging new connections. It might be slow, we might have not travelled to twenty countries yet but we’re alive and we’re thriving. Kolapo Kafilat Oyindamola Ajoke, look! You made it!❤️

With this, I end my spiel. I hope you’ve had a wonderful time walking down this path with me. I’m glad I keep finding the right people around me to guide me all the way.

Honourable mention, my mother dresses me up as a proper Yoruba babe for my fourth😂

Dear 30 year old me,

I hope in ten years, you’re everything you know you could be, the very best. I hope you’ve stayed true to yourself and Christ, I hope you have a wonderful family of your own, more people to call home. Overall, I hope you’re happy.

All my love,

Oyinda, 2024